Alright, alright, another post.

Before I start, the long wait was because my internet severely broke, but anywho….

I got a nifty £20 HMV voucher, and I plan to buy either Burnout or FEAR 2. I played the demo of FEAR 2 because it didn’t take eternity to download like Burnout, and it worked when it did download. Quite good, and I like the graphics. The engine, not so much, but the graphics are quite smooth yet dark.

On the other hand, as much as I loved burnout on the ol’ PS2, the fact that the routes aren’t set, meaning slightly less explosions might make the game a bit bland, especially with keyboard controls. GRID wore thin very, very fast because instead of me frantically enjoying twiddling my thumbs very quickly to make swift manoevers, using a keyboard meant I was leaning back, bored, counting the laps. Also, it was far too easy. Really, I played on the hardest difficulty and it was still to easy.

Not to mention the amount of germans on multiplayer, it was almost as bad as Counterstrike…

More news, I got new speakers, Creative T3100s, and I like them because they look quite pretty, and the base is sublime. I could give them a proper review like people do for speakers, but who the hell cares about how they’re packaged?

Bad news, I accidentally somehow deleted my whole French GCSE folder. The entire thing. Lucky some of it is saved onto my memory stick. I swapped to Opera after Firefox proved why it’s the safest browser to use- It crashes 6/10 times for no reason.

Seems like right now I’m not posting anything interested, i’m just rambling on about things I’ve done and plan to do. So I need to go down to the shops and buy some deoderant and shampoo, and some blu-tack.

Yup, definitely just rambling. But I came up with this very interesting question, Does it count as child porn if you photoshop a child’s head onto a legal person’s nude body?

Ponder that one through while I gander on about other things. I desperately need to buy the two newest futurama mini-movies, Into the Wild Green Yonder, and Bender’s Game. Then I can review them. Hopefully it will be better then Beast With A Billion Backs, which was only mildly amusing. I give it a 5/10 for my ridiculously high standards!

So I apologise for this boring post which isn’t a review, or anything remotely readable, but hopefully I might have something good soon. such as some of my photography if anyone likes to look at pictures.

Spam attacks

Well, it’s not a spam attack as such, because it’s one guy. But- One guy is enough!

Commenting on my post on Scrubs, it wrote

Richard February 6, 2009 at 11:57 am

Hi Roadrunner
I find your blog when I search “Roadrunner’s PC Gaming Blog, But a bit of everything really” in Ovary, and enjoyed reading your post about “Scrubs Season 8 is Appauling“.
You can find more information about the same in ovary search engine. you can search for any particular web page by entering the title or keyword, you can search up to ten search engine at one time from the Ovaru interface.
I find your blog really interesting: plenty of things to discover here!

His search engine sounded like ovary. I don’t want to advertise them so if you want the link head over to google and type in Ovary! Thats right, Google! Actually, speaking of google, if you want to save some energy, use “Blackle“

-Blackle saves watt time because it uses mainly black pixels, black by definition means no light, and hence uses less energy.
-Blackle’s search quality can be considered slightly lower then Google, but if you are doing a specific search, it works perfectly.

There are a couple of downsides though- But not major downsides!

-Blackle does not show links to “Google images/gmail/video/ect.)
-Blackle does not have the “I’m Feeling Lucky” button
-Blackle does not offer in other languages (as far as I know.)

And it saves energy, therefore cuts down on your electricity bills. Because if its saving energy, nobody cares. If its saving money, THE WORLD IS AT STAKE! I’m no mathematician, but it does save a hefty amount of energy compared to Google and the other google variations.

However, this only saves power if you use a CRT monitor. On LCD it uses more power.

Happy Chinese New Year and Introducing a new category

Chinese New Year. I went into chinatown in london with my good SLR camera, and a digital camera. I got 4 shots with the digicam, and 72 shots with the SLR. Well, here are my 3 shots, and when I develop the films, i’ll scan the photos in and show you my satirical photo-skills. Infact, There were loads of photographers there, but they all had ultra expensive and fancy looking kits, while they probably don’t realise that doesn’t make thier shots look any better. I just went in my humble Pentax Camera, and fired away.

Being a kid, it was easy to sneak past the security and get up close to the dragon, and it was entertaining too. Next time i’ll make a fake press pass to get onto the mainstage, so I can greet Boris Johnson with a communist poster with him on it, made as a pasta collage. I didn’t wait around too long, I left at about 3pm because it was getting dark, and because I didn’t have thin gloves, I wore no gloves, and I thought my hand was about to fall off due to frostbite. (The effect of cross-breeding a vampire and a yeti.) Actually it snowed a bit before I left and after I got back, and because I ran out of money on my bus pass, the dick wouldn’t allow me to top up on the bus, and I thought, “Fuck it, fuck you, and fuck your whole bus driving corporation, i’m walking home you douche.” But being far too British and polite I just got off the bus and started walking home with a scarf wrapped tightly around my face looking at the floor in sadness.

Now before I post these digital camera pictures, i’m not going to lie. They’re shit. I’m going to retouch the only good one in photoshop and make a neat little photomanip. Other than that, my SLR shots are in black and white. Yes, I prefer colour but when you’re making a bulk display, if everything is in colour it loses its power and makes it look more like a photo album. If I scanned in a few good shots of the black and white pictures, then added colour into certain parts like in that crap movie Sin City, it would look fantastic I think. However because I develop my own pictures instead of leaving them in a shop for a week or so, this could take a while.

So those are my worst 3 photos. Also, does anyone care whether or not there’s a message if you hover the mouse over a photo? I’ve done it for 99% of the images on my blog, but I doubt anyone looks.

Hmmmm…What else before I go…..

I swapped from Google Chrome to Firefox. I was just so sick and tired of not being able to access youtube without swapping to IE, and couldn’t click on all the amusing links off Steam Chatrooms, so I’m with Firefox now. I like some of the add-ons, like Cooliris for flickr, which just displays pictures in an innovative and cool looking way, but there’s too much going on at the top. I just want a thin tab bar, bookmark bar and navigation bar, and I’m done. Firefox’s are too big, as if to say “LOOK, LOOKIE HERE, I HAVE A NAVIGATION BAR LOOK AT MEEE!”

And I just fixed my grammar too. Well…some of it.

4Chan sucks

Well, it sort of does, but if you get past the porn and smut on /b/ you might find a mildly amusing photo. It gives you a nice sense of joy you’re above the memes and smut to find a mildly hilarious conspiracy on cats, with no jokes going “AHAHA CAT = PUSSIES” Because people on /b/ are beyond that, while not posting penis pictures, they’d instead go for something slightly more higher brow.

Yeah, to some it’s as bad as it looks and they’ll never try it, and I understand that view, Because i’m like that with WoW. Here’s an example of that somethingwhichisntsmut point-

See not bad? American Politics related.  But really, going onto 4chan makes me feel shame and guilt, just because of the taboo. Hovering over my bookmarks to click it is like me putting on some khaki uniform, a helmet, and running in going “GET OVER THAT SHINGLE” with bullets whistling all around me. Saving Priavte Ryan style of course

Next up, i’m sort of known as a cyncial young chap, who nobody knows the deeper layer of heartwarming love underneath. Unfortunately, that layer is buried deeper then the biscuit crumbs of a 50ft trifle. So when I describe something as cute, or heartwarming, or lovemelting etc, it means something. This article made me feel a feeling i’ve never, ever felt before. Ever.  That postman does have a offputting smile though

Infact, can anyone name one evil postman, apart from the IRA postman who make letterbombs, and the one who was arrested a couple of years ago because he stole people’s private and confidential mail?

Not going to change my mind of eating meat though. Speaking of eating meat, I get to work in a vetenarian’s office for a day. Just thought I’d post that on the internet so 0.000000847% of the human race can see.

I think that’s my world percentage statistic anyway. Not a bad post today for a post when I had nothing particular to write about. OH FUCK, FORGOT ABOUT THE NEW TF2 STUFF! Alright, I’ll dig into that tomorrow and possibly try once more to get the WordPress music uploadydoodle to work.

Finito

I’ve done the hardest part of my exams now, and have less work so regular posting shall resume!

Which is good because now I have more time to play a game which i’ve had since xmas but haven’t played any: Tomb Raider Underworld. I also plan to play Gears of War again now acheivments on! Right now i’m drinking coffee to see if I want to swap it for tea, and seem more nonchalant in general.

Well, this tastes too strong, I don’t have refined enough tastebuds to like it. 

I’m getting tired of Google’s predictable search bar, because it’s not predicting what I want at all. All i wanted to know is what to do if I had a bad day, and when I get to “if” the first result is “what to do if you’re raped.”  

Crayola are probably trying to take over the world. If I don’t post again it’s because they’ve put me in a black sack and killed me behind the public’s eye.

Anyway, beginning on the Join the Crayola community today! Why? How can a crayon brand have a community? And surely it’s community would consist entirely of thier fanbase? That being… Just babies. So how would babies get onto a computer? Well, to see if they restrict thier valued customers, I’m now going to pretend I was born in 2006.

Ok, that didn’t work, you need a parent email. I’ll just use my real DoB.But before I proceed I want to point out, the benefits of being a crayola member. 

Personalized Newsletter!

Learn about everything Crayola has to offer! Be the first to learn about new Crayola products for your kids or your classroom.

Coloring pages

Lesson plans

CrayolaStore.com special offers

Crayola Beginnings Newsletters

Age-appropriate advice for children 9–36

I’ll just take out the best bits of being a member-

Colouring pages! For when your too stupid to come up with your own drawings!

Special offers! Get £0.36 of a £50 pack of crayons!

Newsletters! Keep up to date with the crayon industries new products! Like chloroform based crayons!

Advice for your child! Thats right, no don’t raise your children how you want, don’t even read a stupid book! Get great advice on raising your kids from Crayola! And thats not it, Crayola continue to tell you how to raise your children wrong up until the age of 36!

That’s all for now, but if anybody finds it entertaning perhaps I shall investigate more.

Also I’ve picked up nobody likes my music posts, so less of those then!

Following the Trend

Big Note: Not all blogs run by teenagers are how I described below. For example, a good blog I like to read is this one. I read it because the writer obviously has some style and wit to put the lyrics of a Gil Scott Heron song in his blog. There’s also J-mans blog which I can’t spell properly.

Following the trend of many other angsty, whiny blogs run by pretentious fellow teenagers, whining on about why thier lives are unbearable and they have distressing problems which can only be solved by wearing too much mascara and immensely tight jeans, I have also decided to make a post on the internet, expecting people to care. Yes, doing what they do, i’m going to post a song which I like lyrics.

“I don’t want help with my problems, I want to suffer alone but make sure everyone knows about it!”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I01sWilEe_Q

That’s the song, and here are the lyrics!

 

…

 

…

…

 

…

…

 

Well, it was a split up between either that trendy broken beats/ Nu Jazz song, or Living in the Sunlight by Tiny Tim. hmm…Wouldn’t that be hilarious if a typical whiny person described as above, compared his life to Tiny Tim’s upbeat song?

Looking for a job?

In this recession, many, many people have unfortunately lost thier jobs. Back on the open market, the task of finding a new job seems daunting. Well, as a teenager who doesn’t need to go to work or earn money, I thought it would be brilliantly useful with my extended knowledge on life in a workplace to provide a handy list of jobs which flourish in the chernoybl-comparison market.

Politician – Have you ever noticed the fact that all politicians can’t actually relate to the average schmoe? I mean, they can relate to me, but i’m not an average schmoe. Nope, the average british smchoe (I like to use that word) is infact a fairly tubby middle aged man. A teenager with severe acne and doesn’t feel the need to do anything about it. That fuckwad who thinks its good to play music outloud off his ultra-expensive and equally useless phone. (What’s wrong with these assholes? I don’t read from my newspaper aloud.) Yes, he buys the sun, and therefore buys into the right wing hypocritical propaganda. Oh crap, I’m getting too into politics. Although it’s kind of relevent for this job… If you chose to get a job as a politician, you can relate to the above “average schmoe.” (My views above make me look like a snob, but….No comment.) Walk to work in full tracksuits and a flat cap, speak regurlarly with yo, bling and innit, and get young chavs to get voting! Don’t listen to Boris Johnson’s ridiculous plans of forcing chavs to learn latin, even I find latin boring some of the time, and only do it because it will be useful for when I want to go to med-school. So, go for a politican if you’re a chav-scumbag!

Musician – It is true, when the world is in a bad place, the music world shines. Forget the mainstream crap, you can’t compete with a scantily clad african-american making millions for uncreative, boring and shitty songs which only appeal to 10 year olds and morons, go for the more obscure genres. Five examples of obscure music genres by googling music genres are…

1. Spacesynth = Sounds awesome to me But i’m a sci-fi geek. The noise which I set for when my computer starts up is the five noted sound which reoccurs through the movie “Close Encounters of the Third Kind.”
2. Epic Doom Metal = Sounds appauling, but the kind of stuff where you can just laugh away at
3. Lowercase = Imagine the sounds of an examination room. Now imagine that, while you’re completely deaf. Now you don’t have to with Lowercase music!
4. Bitpop = Not Britpop, bitpop. Its the same as 8-bit MIDI soundtracks on the classic SNES games, or more recently, Wii Music. (Worst. Game. Ever. Actually, i’d really love to download the original comic book guy sound clip of that.)
5. Nintendocore = Its Bitpop but… mixes in elements of metal, black metal, death metal, hardcore, hardcore metal, metalcore and metal metal.

Something in the Job Agency business - Don’t follow ensuite with the job-seekers! Lead them! Get a job answering phones and telling people they fail at life and should consider suicide. Nobody loves them and it’s thier own fault they’ve lost thier job. I myself should get a job at the suicide hotline, seeing as they banned my number for being too depressing.

Porn – Low, low option, but it has to be included. Look in the back of newspapers in the want ads. It’s not as seedy as it seems- “Great Conditions and good pay” And so what? So a bunch of strangers see your wang. Whoop de doo. Get over it. Its the human body, why is it bad? Stupid political correctness. Oh right. You’ll be thrusting it back and forth in a pleasing manner.

.Hedgefund manager – There are none of these about at the moment, Not quite sure where they went, but it leaves the market open. Go go go!

Okay, so looking for jobs doesn’t suit you. Well, I haven’t ruled out everything. Seeing as the GBP is so weak, emigrate to poland, work as a builder and you’ll be making loads! Genius, eh? So if you’re broke, desperate, and looking for a job, head up to these interviews with my simple advice. Wear nice shoes. (I’m actually serious, shoes are one of those things which make you look better or worse. )

Merry Christmas to all, but that’s about it.

I have little to say apart from Merry Christmas. My presents included….

Blackadder all season box set, Rowan Atkinson Live, some books ( I like books), Call of Duty world at war, tomb raider underworld, and most importantly…A numark TT USB turntable. So now to rip out all my parents old vinyl, and buy some of my own I’m off to soho to haggle with some backstreet vinyl stores.

So Happy Christmas, and enjoy your turkey, or alternatives if you’re a vegetarian. So that would be some potatoes and….beetroot? 

So far I’ve ripped out the obvious choices, like Earth, Wind and Fire and Stevie Wonder, but i’m choosing a few based on the covers. I found “Electric Light Orchestra” they had a cool, sci-fi looking front cover, and its symphonic rock, which is a pretty nice album. It’s a bit like Pink Floyd’s dark side of the moon, which reminds me, I have to go and buy that one. 

Also, I fear some of my readers are perverts. This is in the “top searches” box. 

Well, I can’t blame you, i’m not for hentai, I prefer real live women, but I can see your side of the argument too.

Two Major Points

The first major point is… wait, that’s no way to start a major point. 

Ahem. So, do any of you have SNES’s? I think if you did back in they day when they were good? (Never before have you had a console with advanced 3D Graphics! 3200 colours! The ultimate challenge is waiting!) Well, at the time they were good. Well, nowadays people can tinker about with those classic games all they like, and most of the time, they all deserve to be sued for copyright infringement.

But once in a while, as with most things, something brilliant will be released. And recently, that brilliant rip off remake is… Super Obama World! And it’s politically relevent! It’s difficult though, so difficult you’d want to throw a shoe at someone. And at the start of the loadup, you get to see the Pepsi advert which you see everywhere, with a woman with some particularly good breasts. Uhh, forget I said anything. Yeah, they’ve probably been photoshopped anyway. Pah. Falsies. 

The plot of the game involves you going through Alaska killing republicans and pigs (If I said same thing, that would be predictable.) As well as collecting American flag lapel pins. Get the delicious pie (I think it’s apple pie) to become Super Obama!

Now my second major point was…Croutons. As crazy as it sounds, Croutons should be in most salads (excluding the ones with chicken in them) to liven them up, and most soups (again, excluding thick broth-like soups, and soups with bits already in.) Although you shouldn’t eat croutons on thier own as a snack, because that’s just weird, and the odds are the yeast will make them expand in your stomach, and make you feel bloated. The second point as you might of been able to tell is just filler material

Also, where are all the good Christmas movies? I can’t think of any good movies which have been released this Christmas, which aren’t interesting, or intense, or arty. Although the arty and intense movies are always released all year round, so forget that. In late November it’s Jewish Film Week, and I saw some great movies then, but whats there to see now apart from Madagascar 2, some crappy keanu reeves (Who doesn’t deserve capitals in his name) movie, and horrific rehased material about Vince Vaughn in his romcom cliche moments of cheesy Christmas spirit?

And there haven’t been any good Christmas hits either this year, just X-factor winners being as unoriginal as possible and singing the most re-done song of the Christmas period ever. Nope, not deck the halls or…another generic chruch hymn, but Hallelujah, which was just a boring song to begin with. And because I was suffering from bronchitis in the last days of term, and subsequently missed the last days of term, I couldn’t use my greatest christmas plan of all time! I had a misteltoe hat, so I would get a kiss from someone. 

Anyone, I’m really that desperate. 

I’m kind of like JD from Scrubs actually O.o

Star Trek Movie?!

I’ve just found out, that for some strange reason, there’s going to be a Star Trek Movie in May. Wow. I never got into Star Trek, partly because when it was really popular, I wasn’t born but I have seen all the cliche moments, and heard about all those classic bits. For example William Shatner’s frenetic movements which talking, and that crazy scottish doctor. You see these references all over the nerds sector of the internet, and its reflected in pop-culture all the time. I’m not a massive movie-goer but hang on a moment. Star Trek! Sometimes a film pops up and has so much hype, nobody will care if its good or bad. I predict it will be the biggest blockbuster producing movie of 2009, and if things go badly- It can’t go as wrong as Evan Almighty?

The trailer- ahaha, it’s so crap its destined to be AWESOME! Although the guy they got to replace Spock looks stupid. I say get Leonard Nimoy back. One thing the film could do without though, the cheesy romance sex part which I saw flash briefly in the trailer. To really appeal to trekkies, it must be all about explosions and space. 

 

But enough dawdling- I hear the Scouts prepping up for the next updates soon. I read on the steam forums some people’s ideas for the new pack, and my favourite idea was a tag-gun to replace the pistol. Basically you can tag people, and see where they are, so if your on Arena, alone you can avoid the big packs. I’ll take anything to stop that bastard shooting your sentry while peeking round corners.

Uhh…Hmmm. Oh, I have to do a bit more christmas shopping, I’ve ended up ordering everything off the internet. Lets hope to sweet moses/jesus/buddha/vishnu/xenu (bloody scientologists) that it arrives in time.